Duolingo has been around for years, but why don't you still know French?

I’ve started to think that all these things people do to “better themselves” are really just a form of self-directed gaslighting.

I remember years ago when I first discovered Brilliant — that app that’s supposed to make learning science fun and interactive. Cool graphics, bite-sized lessons, a slick design — it totally pulled me in. I even tried the free trial because I’ve always wanted to learn more about physics. But honestly, it just started feeling like a job. The constant login streaks, daily reminders, and gamified progress bars sucked the fun out of it.

  

Image by Ekaterina from Pixabay

A few days later, I picked up a copy of A Brief History of Time by Stephen Hawking for about, ₱800. The first few chapters instantly took me back to what I learned in Physics 101. That book’s mine forever — no subscriptions, no notifications, no gimmicks.

Now take my Finnish friends as an example. They downloaded Duolingo to learn Swedish or English, but years later, they still can’t really hold a conversation. Meanwhile, just two years of actually talking to locals helped me get fluent enough to work in Finland.

I don’t have hard evidence for why learning apps don’t work — just personal experience. But I’m pretty sure these apps aren’t designed to make you learn anything. They’re designed to make you feel like you’re doing something productive.

You download one, go through the motions, and before long Duolingo starts pestering you to do your drills. Eventually, you get annoyed, delete the app, and forget why you even wanted to learn Japanese in the first place.

Most people don’t use these apps because they’re starving for growth — they use them to fill in some kind of void.

“I’m not chronically online, I’m researching.”
“I’m not addicted to my phone, I’m learning a new language.”

Yeah, sure. The real issue is that we forget how these apps are built — not to help you, but to keep you hooked. Duolingo doesn’t care if you actually learn a language; it just wants you addicted enough to pay $90 a year for the illusion of progress. Maybe you learn something, maybe you don’t — as long as your screen time stays high.

Gamification gets sold as the magic fix. We gamify everything now — diets, habits, learning — you name it. But gamification totally messes with how we see progress. You start chasing fake experience points instead of real improvement. You see your progress bar go up, get a little dopamine hit, and think, “Wow, I’m really doing it!” But are you? Who cares — you’re level 90 now.

I learned this the hard way when I went through Microsoft’s Learning Course on .NET and C#. I completed the whole front-end track, hit level 9, got all the badges — and still couldn’t code a basic app. The whole thing tricked me into feeling productive when I wasn’t actually learning a damn thing.

The goal wasn’t supposed to be collecting fake XP — it was to build real skills. But the gamification got in the way.

That’s when it hit me: self-improvement doesn’t come from shortcuts or life hacks. No app is going to make you fluent in another language, get you in shape, or make you smarter. Those things take time, effort, and patience. Apps can help a little, sure, but they shouldn’t be your main plan. Filling a progress bar isn’t the same as making progress in real life.

Everything I’ve actually improved at came from doing things directly. I learned Finnish by talking to real people. I stumbled through sentences, copied how others spoke, listened more than I talked. No app could’ve taught me that.

Same with personal finance — I learned by actually managing my own money. I budget manually, track spending almost daily, and adjust things before I overspend. I use my credit card smartly and pay it off quickly. My credit score improved, and now I can take small loans for things like vacations or car repairs. Every budgeting app I tried just stressed me out.

If there’s one thing I want you to take away from this, it’s this: checking off fake tasks on your phone doesn’t mean you’re improving. The sooner you realize that, the sooner you can actually start bettering yourself for real.